I kinda rolled part way through a stop sign on my bike. I stopped at the last moment because a car was coming. I apologized to driver but that wasn't good enough. The bitch had to keep babbling and correcting me. She's probably used to babbling and correcting people on all kinds of topic. How's that joke go? Women say a lot of stuff that doesn't always make sense but they seldom get corrected because there's always somebody who wants to fuck 'em.

I can be a misogynist without be a sexist.

Fridays

There are probably only about 6 cyclists in the world besides Mrs that I don't hate.

I've been mowing the lawn with a push mower (reel mower, ok sporty?) that I bought a couple of years ago. Riding my bike through the yard for half an hour would have the same effect. Maybe if there was more grass and less weeds it would work better. Now, you're up to speed.

On my bike ride this morning I got to pet 4 dogs. The Black Assassin wasn't jealous because she's spoiled fucking rotten. He who pets the most dogs wins. Got it, fucky?

Dinner tonight at the new Mexican restaurant that took over Stabby's old place at 42nd and Cedar. They did it right. They washed the windows. Threw their name on a new awning and started cooking.

JJ, we in trouble

Sometimes she scares the piss out of JJ. He tries to paw her in the head but she's much too quick for that shit.

Is this something Rasta welded together? Tell him I don't return text messages when my minute balance is below 10 minutes. Is it just me or does the fucking thing look like its the length of a school bus.

A hearty Fuck You goes out to anyone who stumbled in here by accident. Go back and post some pearls of wisdom on Twitter, bitch. This blog is for bad asses only.

It's not quite warm enough to have the ac on so for the 3rd time in the 20 years since we air conditioned this dump I have the windows open. Right now every swingin' dick is mowing his lawn.

I want to treat this thing like Facebook except with more foul language.

Where the fuck is my picture of Vinny?

Ask Rasta to take a picture of this contraption with less shit in the background.

Black Assassin and her buddy, JJ.

The Assassin and I have CNBC on all day unless there's a baseball game on. We're the part of the 99% who squirreled away a couple of bucks and doesn't want to work until we're 80 even if it requires buying a few less jerseys and not owning a douchephone.

I'm not the main target for the smart phone market. Kids are being convinced that they're world will fall apart if they aren't in constant contact with their little shitbird buddies.

The first lawn mowing is looming.

My Cubs don't have much in the way of power hitting and the pitching is mediocre at best. This is gonna be a long one.

Exchanged vows at the Grand Canyon. That's hippie talk.

Fridays

Right at 2:50 is one of the classic movie lines of all time from Mac Davis. I can't believe a football coach would encourage his players to knock the opposing team's players out of the game for chump change. 1500 bucks for a knockout!?! That's some serious cash.