Tuesday, November 30, 2010

I wouldn't walk through Powderhorn Park alone at night. I would with either Scanny or Sassy.

I bought the cutest pair of boots at Kaplan Brothers today. They're fur lined with a side zipper. I have a dog with a 6 hour bladder. You do the math.

Now have a pedometer and trying to do the whole 10,000 steps thing. 6000 short yesterday. Off to a better start today. One in every 50 steps produces a shot of impressive knee pain. Once again, do the math.

Mrs says that prospective home buying couples should look at homes separately and then together. That way the man could check out the mechanical stuff like the plumbing, furnace and roof. Then the woman could check out the logistical stuff like closets and shit. I wouldn't buy a house without having one of those home inspector guys look at it first. That said, I hope to leave this house feet first even if it's this afternoon.

Monday, November 29, 2010

But if you've got a warrant I guess you're gonna come in

It isn't a problem until I run out of room.

Great 4 and half day weekend with Mrs and the puppies. The inside of our home looks very Christmassy. Thank God we have Mrs.

We observe a moment of silence for the great Leslie Nielsen. Shirley, you can't be serious.

Breakfast at Maria's with The Plumber.

I am going to say hello to people and smile at them even though I didn't go to high school with them and not give a shit if they display the personality of a dish rag in return.

Bears win but who cares? Vikings fans are back on the Super Bowl bandwagon after winning on the road for the first time since Clinton was President.

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Oh we're definitely related.

I applied online at K-Mart this morning. No, for the 3rd f-ing time, I've never worked for K-Mart or been convicted of a felony. And no I wouldn't turn in Little Johnny. I'm from Chicago. Where's mine?

Mrs and I each have 160 minutes on our cell phones so if you'd like to have a 2 minute conversation please call.

Black Friday shopping was limited to Nokomis Shoe store on 50th and 34th Ave. 20% off all hats and gloves. Never have enough hats.

We might maybe may ride our bikes the grueling 2.49 miles to Midtown for a cup of coffee and some lively conversation. We better go soon because as we all know the sun now goes down at 2.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Happy Thanksgiving

Zero hour approaches. Time to clean up somewhat and head out to Hopkins for Thanksgiving dinner with the Watsons. We bring the rolls from Baker's Wife. Each one has a half a stick of butter in it.

The wind is howling and it's 14 degrees and I sure the heck hope you're not freezing your ass off in some thin-asses school clothes. I'm mixing in a little Carhartt and a warm hat because that car is chilly chilly chilly.

I can hear Tom Brady carving up Detroit in the other room so it's time for a Triple S-er (Wroblewski boys understand) and then chow time.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Hard to believe we got the keys to this house 20 years ago today. No big celebrations planned. I'll more likely celebrate that we picked up our 1994 Toyota Camry 17 years ago today and have driven it 155,000 miles in that time. I'll have an Allina accountant do the math for you.

The great Mrs is leaving at 1:15 today and then we go to lunch before traffic hits the fan.

No call back from Target as of yet.

It was 20 years between the times I saw both my brothers at the same time. Don't take anything for granted.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

I was a little lazy yesterday so all I could come up with was a quick dog video.

Scanny and I picked up the chiminea at Home De-Pot so I can burn all the sticks and branches that have piled up around here. Sure I'd like to set up shop with a 55 gallon drum in a vacant lot but Minneapolis just isn't the place for that.

Childress got fired but you've still got a 41 year old man with a sore arm and a f-ed up ankle running the show.

I applied online for a job at Target today. I don't work Fridays or weekends and my salary demands would make Gordon Gecko hyperventilate.

I'd like to ride a bike outside but it's 18 degrees outside and cuddly warm inside.

Monday, November 22, 2010

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Some woman near the Lake Street LRT Station remarked quickly with a brrrr because I was on a bicycle yesterday. It was about 30 at that time with a decent wind. I guess I'm a part of something whether I'll admit it or not.

Going to see Unstoppable this morning at 10:30. Sassy had me up at 4:30 to get my day off to a good start.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Hey smart guy, TMZ ain't the only ones with photos.

Knee hurt like a MF and a two hour nap seemed to help quite a bit.

I agree with one of Mrs' coworkers who says she's always ready for a good pat down. Hold me.

Hennepin County wants to raise our property taxes 18%. Then why is little Jimmy such a dumb shit?

The black dog only requires 8 to 9 minutes of sleep a day. I'll lend her to you people with kids for play time but keep the Bactine handy. What's Bactine? It's what mothers in the 60's put on cuts and knife wounds to disinfect. Yeah, it stung like a ...

The nice thing is that I've run off most of my old crowd of readers and am now working on alienating a whole new crowd.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Ok jigglestick, I took the ink blot test, got a connector for my ipod, got the special dog treats from Chuck and Don's and picked up a couple of nice pastries from Rustica. Two dogs in the microwave ain't Uncle Frankies but they'll do. Now, I'm browning the hamburger as instructed and may get in a little light mopping too.

You see, the term customer service has the term customer in it. If you're going to be rude or an airhead then fuck off and get another job.

Who's happy? The guys on the City Of Minneapolis yard waste truck because the snow pretty much put an end to any leaf activities. Bless you boys.

Sadly or not, my cell phone minutes expire today. I would have bought more at the T-Mobile kiosk at Southdale but the guy told me he didn't open for another 10 minutes. So I bid him a fond fuck you and will now investigate who has the best deal.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

ESPN has a college basketball marathon but I still cleaned the kitchen floor and gave myself a haircut. I shaved and have a cut on my chin that was close to requiring stitches.

My next 9 lives will be as an old lady's Golden Retriever.

Mrs is quite impressed by my pleated Dockers that I'm riding in these days.

I know how piss-your-pants excited some of you get about snow but I'd prefer a winter with almost no snow.

Pot roast baby, pot roast.

Time for a cup of coffee and a mini candy bar.

Monday, November 15, 2010

Snowy Bear, Sassy and I just got back from the airport. They were offering free pat downs from 9 to noon. Usually, you need to buy me dinner to fondle me but as long as it's in the name of national security, what the heck.

Meat loaf for lunch. I was told to eat it or throw it away.

Cell phone minutes will expire this week but at least I think I can still use the phone as an alarm clock.

I can hear Vikings fans jumping off the bandwagon.

The Snowy Bear showed the puppy just who the Queen Bee is this morning.

Keep those header photos coming. We'll get to all of them.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

I took Mrs to Herberger's during the big snowstorm yesterday because she's awesome and she bought me breakfast.

I cleaned the gutters and roof valleys Friday and didn't fall off the roof. Scanny mulched up the rest of the leaves and we're looking good for winter.

Hats off to everyone who froze their asses off at Bassett Creek the last 2 days in the name of cyclocross.

Bears win homeboy!

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Today is Veteran's Day. Today I ride my bike for those who will never ride their bike again and for this poor girl who just wanted to be close one more time.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010


Happy birthday, Debbie! I always liked this picture from when you pushed those little brats out of the way so you could get a better view of the Hollidazzle Parade. They should have been home in bed anyway.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

I'm high maintenance because I demand hot dog buns with a freshness date before 10/1/10. Riding 20 miles in the morning involves a certain amount of aimless wandering. Some guy in a shitbox Yugo told me there may be a Rollo available in the basement. Can I be more esoteric without you getting your thong in a bunch?

I was told to not go up on the roof when no one is home. Hey, a big bag of shit just fell off that roof! I was turned away at the door at the new Peace Coffee coffee shop. Hey kids, you can ride your little bike with your cool cycling hat and a Chrome bag but only Mommy and Daddy are out at 5:50 am (Are you still in your smoking jacket?) on their way to the big hospital on Riverside Avenue.

Blowing the doors off some shitbird with panniers will lead to stiffness in the knee area. But let's face it, that knee is shot. I want to try acupuncture just so I can take a photo of my knee with 200 needles in it.

Alright spanky, that's enough of this.

Monday, November 8, 2010

Good job on your header photo selections . We'll get to all of them.

Mrs and I attended (more of a stop over) the cross races at the Velodrome on Saturday. It's the first bike race I have gone to this year. Great to see the old crowd even the ones who are too GD important to talk to me.

Waiting to hear if Tuffy has fired Brad Childress. It is Brad, isn't it?

The Assassin got called for a clipping penalty yesterday forcing me to lose my balance and step on one of her toys (Kong) which rolled out from under my foot causing me to go down. You may have felt the tremor.

Enjoy the time change and extra daylight in the morning which will last till Friday. To balance this off it now gets dark at 2pm.

Friday, November 5, 2010

Thanks to Lord Snakecrotch for the header photo of his bike. Monte has submitted a nice action photo of him clearing a barrier at a cross race. Very nice work. Monte and I agree that riding flat tires when you race cross is ludicrous.

The lovely Mrs will be leaving work early today to renew her driver's license at the Midtown Global Market Service Center.

Remember, the email address is wroblewski58@yahoo.com. I have pictures of some of you. I'll pull them out and use them. You can submit header photos that don't contain you. Photos of food are always good. A nice photo of your alley works too.

It was little brisk this morning (29 degrees) when a 4'11" gal blazed a trail to work. I was the candyass with 2 pairs of gloves on.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Yeah, we know how f-ing awesome we are, bitch!

Judging by the dirty look I got from a woman customer at Colossal Cafe any type of laughter is prohibited. Eat a bag of shit, lady. You suck.

It is a beautiful cool crisp morning in Minneapolis.

The Republicans are in the process of painting over all of the bike lanes and opening the Greenway to car traffic. The kicker is that two years from now you halfwits will have elected Sarah Palin as President and you too will be able to see Russia from your house.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Submit a photo to wroblewski58@yahoo.com and I'll probably post it as the header photo. Don't be a chickenshit your whole life. Stop mumbling and come in out of the shadows. Regular correspondents Ro-Po PW, Johnny Boy, Tuffy and Snakecrotch will all be happy to know that your pay raises were approved by the board.

The Republicans are in and now sanity will be restored he said with a larger than average dose of sarcasm.

In my day I could have made the Man v. Food guy look like he was eating in a dainty fashion.

34 years ago today I had a job interview with the City of Kansas City, MO and I had a problem catching the right bus. I was late but got the job anyway. It was the day after election day and everyone was talking about our new President, Jimmy Carter.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

You can throw a garden hose out in your regular waste bin in Minneapolis which is the highlight of the day so far. I thought you might have to cut it up into 3 inch lengths like when you're trying to get rid of a f-ing branch.

I have a Tim Couch Cleveland Browns jersey that I won on E-bay 3 or 4 years ago. People make fun of Tim Couch. He played in the NFL and is married to a Playboy playmate. I offered some guy 25 bucks for another Tim Couch jersey on E-bay. He'll sell it to you for $99. He's hiding the fact that it's a Tim Couch jersey by not showing the name on the back. You deceptive bastard!

I'll vote with Mrs after she gets off work. In 20 years I can be an election volunteer.

Shit baby, it's time to eat. Take me to Defcon 1.

Monday, November 1, 2010

It's ok, I only THOUGHT we were out of hot dogs and the buns are good till 9/21/10.

Where were we? Oh yeah, I've ridden my little fleet of bikes and The Dragger 4129 miles this year. Between September 12th and October 22nd we drove our car 276 miles. What's the moral of the story? It's time for Halloween candy. That's the moral.

I moved to the Somerset Apartments 32 years ago yesterday. Animal costumes work best when it's below 50 degrees. That is my brother John pictured above.

Saturday was such a beautiful day weather wise that Mrs and I remained in our pajamas the entire day and even walked the furry children in our jamms. I broke these people down long ago. Besides a touch of college football we watched The Italian Job, The Bourne Ultimatum and The Departed.

The Assassin was quite pissed off to be in her kennel with so much activity in her front yard. We went through 7 bags of candy and I gave one kid a fresh clip for his 9 mm. The hood's always got your back.