Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Monday, July 25, 2011
Yeah, it's me. Maybe 9 or 10 years old? My head is the same size today but I weigh 200 pounds more.
Miss Debbie didn't sleep worth a shit last night so she elected to sleep an hour and a half past the 4:30 alarm and be driven to work. Who can blame her.
After a mere 200 pulls my lawnmower started and I mowed the lawn. The Assassin watched my every move so I felt completely safe.
Man, it's chili dog time and the buns are fresh. Eat something good for lunch and stop fucking around.
Miss Debbie didn't sleep worth a shit last night so she elected to sleep an hour and a half past the 4:30 alarm and be driven to work. Who can blame her.
After a mere 200 pulls my lawnmower started and I mowed the lawn. The Assassin watched my every move so I felt completely safe.
Man, it's chili dog time and the buns are fresh. Eat something good for lunch and stop fucking around.
Friday, July 22, 2011
Fridays
Mrs and I rode the last 2 days because it wasn't Africa hot. Miss Debbie's tomato plants loved the heat and humidity. It looks like she's going to get at least two tomatoes off three plants which constitutes a bumper crop by any one's standards.
The jersey on the far left is the one I covet. I'd get one with Kendry Morales's number on it because who doesn't love a guy who breaks his leg celebrating a walk-off home run and then misses a whole year because of it.
How come there's 2 shitty little grocery stores at 42nd and 28th but no shitty little grocery store at 42nd and Cedar. At least currently.
Last week a guy rented a bike at Midtown and left his luggage while he rode his rental. I made a terrorist reference/crack and someone took umbrage to my comment. Called me 'over-the-top obnoxious'. My government has spent a trillion dollars on wars which have cost thousands of lives. They've also tried to beat it into my head that unattended luggage is bad ju-ju. I should have just called Homeland Security.
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Monday, July 18, 2011
Yeah, it's hot out and there's no breeze but who really gives a shit. I told Mrs last night that it would be too hot to ride a bike and I didn't want to meet Uncle Larry for breakfast drenched with sweat. So I drove Debbie to work and parked the car near the 46th Street Station and talked to Kruse on the train even though he was trying to avoid me. Conversation on public transportation is strictly forbidden in Minnesota which is why I always talk loud enough to piss all those people off.
Friday, July 15, 2011
Fridays
Let's take this slowly.
I stopped and waited for the rain to slow down at the 32nd and Minnehaha bus shelter even though later I would become completely drenched and even fuck around with my gutters during a complete deluge.
Anyway, while under the shelter a guy came and I smiled in the way that you might use to recognize another human being on this planet. He gave me a dirty look and proceeded to eat his banana. Hey, is that a banana in you hand...
Well, Fucky's bus came and he was looking down at his Ipod so the driver figured he'd keep going so I pointed out that - 'hey, there's your bus' - when the bus was within sight but not withing catching distance.
So the guy muttered something at me and ran back up 32nd Street to hopefully call a cab and spend 20 bucks on that.
I stopped and waited for the rain to slow down at the 32nd and Minnehaha bus shelter even though later I would become completely drenched and even fuck around with my gutters during a complete deluge.
Anyway, while under the shelter a guy came and I smiled in the way that you might use to recognize another human being on this planet. He gave me a dirty look and proceeded to eat his banana. Hey, is that a banana in you hand...
Well, Fucky's bus came and he was looking down at his Ipod so the driver figured he'd keep going so I pointed out that - 'hey, there's your bus' - when the bus was within sight but not withing catching distance.
So the guy muttered something at me and ran back up 32nd Street to hopefully call a cab and spend 20 bucks on that.
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
So, Mrs called in yesterday because she didn't want to go. Good for her. I taught her well.
I watched Adrian Gonzalez take his first round swings in the home run contest and then changed the channel. I guess watching guys hit batting practice home runs just doesn't have the same appeal as it once did.
I like it when I'm the guy who starts the mowing cycle with my neighbors.
I see a lot of roadies on the Greenway on their little bicycles. I know all the fast guys in the state of Minnesota so if I don't recognize you then you're not as fast as you think. Fuck that guy and his "Garage Logic".
I watched Adrian Gonzalez take his first round swings in the home run contest and then changed the channel. I guess watching guys hit batting practice home runs just doesn't have the same appeal as it once did.
I like it when I'm the guy who starts the mowing cycle with my neighbors.
I see a lot of roadies on the Greenway on their little bicycles. I know all the fast guys in the state of Minnesota so if I don't recognize you then you're not as fast as you think. Fuck that guy and his "Garage Logic".
Friday, July 8, 2011
Thursday, July 7, 2011
Happy 2nd birthday to my Sassy girl! She may look sad here but she's actually just relaxing in her Daddy's chair.
I'm trying to fight off the urge to take a nap, but really, why fight it?
I stopped and looked at the flowers on the Greenway near Bryant I guess this morning. You should do that some time. Especially you bug-up-your-ass-roadies. Fuck, you're missing half the fun of riding a bike. Yeah, walking is great but you can cover more ground on a bike.
You Twinkies fans shouldn't get down on your boy Capps. None of these so-called closers comes into the game and gets 3 outs quickly. They all fuck around and throw 25 pitches, walk two guys and get the job done by the skin of their teeth.
I'm trying to fight off the urge to take a nap, but really, why fight it?
I stopped and looked at the flowers on the Greenway near Bryant I guess this morning. You should do that some time. Especially you bug-up-your-ass-roadies. Fuck, you're missing half the fun of riding a bike. Yeah, walking is great but you can cover more ground on a bike.
You Twinkies fans shouldn't get down on your boy Capps. None of these so-called closers comes into the game and gets 3 outs quickly. They all fuck around and throw 25 pitches, walk two guys and get the job done by the skin of their teeth.
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
I guess if you subtract the time spent outdoors bike riding and dog walking from the total time spent outdoors I suppose I spend about a good hour a week outside during the summer. And that includes watering the flowers and mowing. Yep, f-ing legendary.
Yesterday, on the other hand, Mrs and I got the jungle of bushes and trees under control in a little over 2 hours. Mowing not included and some parts sold separately.
If you have Netflix I highly recommend watching The Pat Tillman Story.
Yesterday, on the other hand, Mrs and I got the jungle of bushes and trees under control in a little over 2 hours. Mowing not included and some parts sold separately.
If you have Netflix I highly recommend watching The Pat Tillman Story.
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